Creating Lifetime Connections

Each year, a group of select Arizona men are invited on a journey. Not just any journey, but one carefully planned to include awe, inspiration, casual and deep conversation, climbing, scrambling, rappelling -- plus, a bit of fear and a lot of challenge. These trips make connections among men that remain for a lifetime.

Stephen Harris, Assemblies of God Arizona district superintendent, and Leigh Metcalf, Arizona district secretary-treasurer and missions director, invite a different group of around twenty men to go canyoneering in Zion National Park, Utah, each year. Leigh explains, "Zion has world-class canyons for hikers of every skill level."

Kevin Macfee, Chi Alpha Campus Ministries pastor at Embry Riddle Aeronautical University in Prescott, Arizona, leads these teams. He explains, "We spend four days camping, hiking, and canyoneering through the tallest sandstone cliffs in the world, as well as rappelling into and exploring the deep-slot canyons."

Descending into these
 canyons requires the men to rappel off drops downward to 170 feet, swim through dark, ice-cold pools of water, scramble over rocks and boulders, and navigate the most remote spots in the southwest.

"Many ingredients go into relationships built on these trips -- the team building, the hours talking on the trail, reaching a summit, or sharing a meal -- but the one 'killer' ingredient that makes this adventure so potent in opening the hearts of men is shared experience," Macfee explains.

Metcalf agrees, "Most guys have never attempted a hike like in Zion Park. Walking backward off a 100-foot cliff is an astonishing feeling. Each man must trust the equipment and the guides who talk him through each step. Each man depends on the support of others."

Macfee breaks down shared experience with one word: discovery. "Discovery can be defined by exploration and awe," he adds. "When you explore with your friends, not knowing what's next -- then, round a corner and view scenery so spectacular, so deeply beautiful it inspires awe and a collective gasp -- that moment draws you close. You are both appreciating the same thing, and have both worked hard to get there. This epic adventure of discovery, exploration, and awe shared by men becomes a touchstone. The 'you-had-to-be-there' moment creates a unique fraternity."

Beyond discovery is another shared experience -- that of fear. "Overcoming fear and meaningful moments of bravery are so powerful. This kind of adventure scares men. No one gets through without having to overcome some fear," Macfee states.

The men on the trip learn to trust each other with their physical life. Macfee further explains, "When another man has seen me really scared, has spent time encouraging me, has watched me overcome that fear, and when I've done the same for him -- we form a bond. It's a foxhole-type moment." This kind of intimacy leads to deeper connections and genuine, raw conversations about the things that matter most.

Any church or small group can provide shared experience for men. "It obviously doesn't have to be in Zion National Park or in a canyon. Shared experience can happen in many different ways- it just needs to offer men the opportunity for exploration and moments of bravery," Macfee adds.

Metcalf explains, "Jesus' model of discipleship included some great moments with the disciples -- whether going on a fearful boat ride through a storm, hiking into the mountains to pray, or holding a BBQ on the beach after a night of fishing."

"Leaders need to create moments for men to experience life in ways they never have before. Sharing these moments together creates a lasting connection and friendship that opens the door to meaningful conversations and opportunities for God moments," Metcalf continued.

"The reason I've had the privilege of these moments again and again with men is shared experience," Macfee concludes. "We're all scared, we're all vulnerable, and we're all exposed. We're in it together."